I’m Bella, I’m 28 years old and I am a mum to one year old Walter.
I wanted to share a little about my journey through from pregnancy to welcoming my little boy into the world.
When I decided I wanted to be a mum-ironically, I wasn’t particularly worried about how I would manage physically, despite not having alot of movement in my arm I was more worried about my anxiety around the labour and birth.
I was born with right Erb’s Palsy back in 1996. My birth was something that was an extremely difficult event for all involved and I grew up knowing that it was something that went very wrong. We spent my whole childhood suing the hospital trust I was born under and I knew that there were things they did that meant I was injured during my birth. Being part of the Erb’s Palsy community means you know more than most about how things can go wrong and I won’t lie when I say I was anxious about something going wrong. I wanted more than anything for my baby’s birth to be so different from mine- a positive experience I could hold a healthy baby at the end of.
I was really fortunate in that my local NHS trust has a dedicated team of mental health midwives that are there to help and support pregnant people with their emotional wellbeing. I voiced my concerns at my booking appointment and I was subsequently allocated a mental health midwife. I met with them every few weeks to check in where I was at and if I was worried about anything. I was also put under a consultant to monitor the baby’s growth, have extra growth scans and discuss my preference for birth.
The support was invaluable and meant I could be open and honest with someone about how I was feeling about the upcoming birth. They gave me as much information as they could regarding managing shoulder dystocia’s and protocols in place (although I will add these were not the best!!).
My labour only lasted 5 hours from start to finish and at the end of it I gave birth to my little boy Walter. Despite complications with his breathing and needing to be taken to special care, I would still say I had a very positive experience of labour and birth thanks to my plans in place and preparation. I was given one of the nicest rooms on the labour ward, the staff were above attentive to my needs and anxieties and I couldn’t have asked for them to reassure me more in the situation. They all seemed aware of what was going on and why I was worried which put my mind at ease.
My point in this story is:
· Prepare as much as you feel you need to.
· Don’t think you’re causing a fuss or being demanding.
· If you want information ask for it.
· If you feel worried and anxious see if you’re NHS trust has a team like mine did.
· You have a right to know how the hospital would manage certain situations and if it makes you feel safer in the process then even better.
I know now that when I go on in the future to have any more children, I can do the same again should I feel I need it. Walter is now one year old and I love being his mum. I feel so lucky to have had the opportunity to bring such a happy, healthy little human in to the world.
